Diocese of Toledo, Ohio

Browsing From the Pastor

Clearing Up Misunderstandingts About the Situation of Divorce

   Almost all of us know or are related to a person who has experienced or who is experiencing the trauma of divorce. Even though divorce is not in accord with God’s plan for marriage, the Lord does not forsake us if we find ourselves in this situation.

   The purpose of this article is to correct misunderstandings that circulate about the situation of divorced persons in relation to the Catholic Church. First, Catholic persons who experience divorce are not excommunicated from the Church. Persons who have experienced divorce are strongly encouraged to receive the Sacraments of Reconciliation and the Eucharist on a regular frequent basis.

   If a divorced Catholic goes ahead and marries another person without going through the Church’s annulment process, the Church insists that a person in this situation refrain from receiving the Sacraments until one has worked through the Church to rectify his/her marriage situation.

   Here is where the Diocesan Marriage Tribunal comes in. The Marriage Tribunal is the healing arm of the Church for those whose marriages have failed. After having experienced the trauma of divorce, some persons resolve that they never intend to marry again. Never say never. Over a period of time, this resolve can change. For this reason, I highly recommend that Catholics who have experienced divorce or the civil dissolution of their former marriage proactively explore the possibility of having the consent to their former marriages declared null and void by our Diocesan Tribunal. Judy Pompei of St. Mary Parish and Sherry Stockmaster, a staff member of Resurrection Parish, have been trained and are authorized by our Diocesan Tribunal to prepare annulment cases that would then be submitted to our Diocesan Tribunal. Please feel free to contact either Sherry at 419-884-0060 or Judy at 419-589-3585. Either of these ladies will assist you to look into the possibility of having the consent that you exchanged in all former marriages declared null and void by our Diocesan Marriage Tribunal.

   Some persons mistakenly assume that if and when the consent to a former marriage is declared null and void, this would make the children born within that marriage illegitimate. This is not true. In the eyes of the Catholic Church, no human being is ever regarded as illegitimate.

   A misunderstanding that needs to be corrected is the assumption that in the annulment process, the Church is trying to determine which party is responsible for the failed marriage. This assumption is not correct. The annulment process is trying to determine whether or not at the time that the couple whose marriage failed exchanged their wedding vows, they had the intrapersonal and interpersonal qualities that are essential for sacramental marriage. The annulment of the consent of a given marriage indicates that these qualities were lacking in that marriage. In a sense, whenever an annulment is granted, it is a win-win situation for both parties. Assuming that all restrictions that go with the granting of a decree of nullity have been met and are lifted, for example, providing for the needs of the children born in previous marriages, each party is free to prepare for and to enter into a marriage that is recognized by the Catholic Church.

   Let us be grateful for the assurance that if and when persons whom we know and love and maybe even ourselves hit rock bottom by experiencing divorce, there is hope. The Lord never gives up on any of us. Let us be thankful for the offer of healing and strength that the Lord would extend to us through our Diocesan Marriage Tribunal and through persons who are authorized to represent this healing arm of our Lord’s redeeming love.

Sincerely yours in Christ,

Fr. Nelson Beaver – Pastor  

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